Sunday, October 29, 2006

Thanks for the advice Closet. It's been fairly close to my own outlook on the situation, but it's just nice to hear it from someone else. lol.

Well, things have been a little slow with me lately and it seems as though it's been the same way on the net!
It appears as though nothing new has cropped up! or at least nothing I know about. I think I've had my fill of dressing, it's too bad that there's nothing good for watching though!

if anybody has any interesting links or anything, feel free to drop a few here!!!

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

a free moment

Okay, well. I now find myself at the computer with a bit of free time, but nothing interesting to say!!!

I haven't done any dressing or masking for the past few weeks and am feeling like it's getting to be that time again.. but I'm not entirely sure when, hopefully this week.

This past month has been interesting. Lots of self-reflection, lots of stuff going on, lots of plans being made, lots of changes on the horizon. One of my bigger future plans does not coincide with my x-dressing/rubber tendencies, however I have no idea at this point whether it is Really going to affect anything or not.. I mean, it will for a few months at least, but I'll see I suppose.
Furthermore, unless I've already disclosed these plans, they're a secret. lol.

In general I have been feeling less and less sexual lately. I'm not entirely sure why. I find myself taking 20 or so minutes to climax from masturbating any given night when I used to take 1 to mayyybe 5 minutes.
I've also accumulated a number of female-options at this point, however there's only one I'm after and it's probably going to fall through anyway. Furthermore, she seems like a completely unsexual person as is. In the meantime I've been getting stalked and/or harassed by 4 girls and 1 guy (none of which are associated with my online personality). 2 of the girls want relationships, but I am entirely uninterested. And the other 2 girls, I don't entirely know what they want yet. Finally, the one guy just creeps me out cause I'm straight.

But yeah, it's been strange being picky while being single.. Cause I'm not exactly happy in my singlehood, however I'm not willing to just jump into anything with anyone. As I would have told many of my single friends in the past, "beggars can't be choosers!" yet, I find myself acting as a 'chooser.'
So it's been a little strange.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

busy week!

Well, I've been busy... doing stuff and recovering.

Anyway, all the explanations of everything will come with time.. in the meantime, i'll air out some more pix.
for all the up-skirt fans. =P

Thursday, October 19, 2006

gyahhhh!

man, my body is all bruised and hurting...

details later.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Anima's Diet

Okay, well. Late last fall I realized that I really wanted to lose some weight.

I went through a period where I was exercising 7 days a week; half of the days I danced from 1-3 hours and the other days I ran on a treadmill for 30-50 minutes. I also tried to watch what I ate, but had very little weight loss.

I did a lot of research on dieting, metabolism jumps along with metabolism in general, the psychological side of crash dieting vs. eating less as well as typical internal reasons why most people eat, I also consulted a couple friends of mine who were personal trainers at the time and finally came up with a method of weight loss that has actually worked for me.

Anyway, when I started this plan I stopped going to the gym, however I continued dancing merely for personal enjoyment.

So, I didn't originally eat breakfast ever, but had read this is unhealthy AND oddly associated with obesity. So I started eating fairly large, protein-rich breakfasts; 2/3 scrambled eggs (or a couple bowls of cereal when I was feeling lazy), a few pieces of buttered toast, a cup of juice, and maybe some fruit if it was available.

For lunch; I would usually have a moderately sized meal, nothing special. (however, most days I didn't really have lunch, just cause I'm on a weird sleep schedule)

For dinner, or what I've been calling my 'last meal of the day,'; I'd have whatever I wanted. Many times I kind of gorged during this meal, but you really shouldn't do this. Normally I'd either have Japanese food (unagi-don, chicken teriaki with some sushi on the side) or two bowls of spaghetti with meatsauce or a sandwich with noodles. Basically, not that small.

::Portion Control::
Now, the central aspects of the diet aren't really in what you eat during the meals necessarily, but it is more about portion control. However, it's not all that easy to just stop eating when you're chowin' down!
This is largley because there are 2 central causes of hunger/satiety.
1) the duodenum has been heavily connected to hunger (it's a sphincter at the bottom of your stomach that connects to your small intestine). This basically means that when your duodenum is not receiving food, you feel hungry. However, when you are eating or even once you've finished, you may not feel full, but then realize that you are in fact full 10 or 30 minutes later! It's because it takes a lot of time for the food to reach your duodenum. So half or even a quarter of the way through your meal you might already be full and not know even it!

So, to deal with this, my best advice is portion control and breaks when you eat. So if you'd typically eat X amount of food, only take 0.5X, eat it, then wait 10 minutes and if you're still hungry, go ahead and eat the other half of your meal. In this case, even if you eat as much as you were before, you'll digest it faster and it'll ultimately put less stress on your system and secrete fewer fats from the food.

2) The statistic changes all the time, but it's been found that somewhere between 40-80% of the time people mis-interpret thirst as hunger. Meaning; when you might just need a cup of water, you'll go eat a hamburger.
So from knowing this, whenever I felt hungry I would drink a large cup of water and wait 10 minutes. If I was still hungry, then I would eat the 0.5X meal, take a break and drink another cup of water and wait 10 minutes. For the first few weeks I continued eating the other half, but after some time I stopped feeling hungry after the second cup of water.

::Drinks and Snacks::
I only drank water and tried to usually have about a gallon a day. I know most of you probably drink no water and when you do it's not a pleasant experience. Well, for some reason I enjoy drinking water, so this wasn't difficult for me. If you really can't moderate your juice/soda/etc. consumption, then designate a flavored drink as a snack OR have those drinks only before/up to dinner.

I'm sure most of you have heard that people gain the most weight from snacking. I'm assuming it's true, however I have no direct references I can draw from at the moment. Anyway, I am and have been an avid snacker, however I knew it was bad for me. So, I replaced all my cookies, chips, etc. with fruit.

::The Most Important Detail::
Also, the most important aspect of this diet is not eating within at least 3 hours of going to bed! I know that eating right before you sleep is great and it really knocks you out. I also know that we've all heard the saying, "don't go to bed on an empty stomach," but right now I'm telling you that if you want to lose weight (somewhat) easily you certainly won't be going to bed full!

The reason why you pass out after eating a lot is because your body releases insulin (not tryptophan, unless it's Thanksgiving. hehe.) for some reason the combination of insulin along with all your blood going to your stomach makes you tired. I've also had a few friends who'se fathers have had multiple heart attacks which, according to their physicians, was due to their late-night gorging. However, I don't want to be saying that anyone's in danger of having a heart-attack if they eat a lot and pass out nor am I saying it's verified fact that it is even connected.

Anyway, the reason why I stopped eating before bed was this; one's metabolism drops greatly while sleeping. So if you're stomach is full during this time, then all the fats in the food you ate are being stored in your body instead of being burnt away by physical activity or just being awake.
So, it is very important for weight loss to have an empty stomach before going to bed each night.

As a basic trend; one's cortisol and metabolism are at their highest shortly after waking up. So, that is why it is important to eat then, because you'll need fuel for the day. Also, all the food you eat in the morning will be burnt throughout the day. Similarly with lunch and dinner. However, if you eat right before sleep, then you're not burning those carbs, they're just getting stored in your ass! (well, lets hope it's your ass. lol.)

So that's basically my diet is; snack on fruit, drink a lot of water (especially before/during meals), portion control, and DO NOT EAT BEFORE BED! Also, if you're not accustomed to going to sleep on an empty stomach, it'll probably throw off your sleep a bit. I know for the first couple weeks it was exceedingly difficult for me and I'd cave in and have a hand-full of cereal or a banana or something in the middle of the night just to quiet the hunger pangs. Although, now I can't go to bed if I've eaten, it actually gives me a stomach ache. So, if you're trying this and it's hard going to sleep, it'll pass.. and if you're becoming an insomniac, take some melatonin or benadryl (those are 'sleep aids' that have had some of the fewest side effects). Oh yeah, they're also over-the-counter.



But yeeaaah. I know dieting sucks and I'm going back into it fairly hard now, but! it's been such a pay-off being able to fit into girl's clothes comfortably and actually looking like a cute rubber-girl.
It's also made me more of a cute rubber/vanilla guy too.
=P

Monday, October 16, 2006

gotta fast... fast

October is already half gone! oish.

I'm assuming that most of you had the idea that I'd prepare something for Halloween. Well... if you thought that, then you were wrong!
However, now I'm thinking about trying something.. nothing public or extravagant, just something I havent yet seen done. Yet, I'm sure I just haven't looked hard enough.

Anyway, I doubt I'll be able to pull it off in time, or at all for that matter.
It's going to require me to lose some additional weight, especially cause I feel like I've packed on about 10 pounds of muscle and a few pounds of fat in the past month. So I'll have to re-initiate my former diet. (the one where I lost 40/50ish pounds earlier this year)

If anybody is curious about this diet, I can tell you about it, but it's pretty boring. I just made it up after I decided that I wanted to lose weight and it's worked pretty well.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Mowah pix


So yeahhhh. I'm having some difficulty coming to any conclusions about how things have been going for me lately... cause, I haven't been busy, but I've had no free time. I haven't been happy, but I haven't been upset.

Things have just been rolling along, but it's far from business as usual.. weird.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

dusting off some old pix

by old I mean a few weeks old.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

oh me oh my!

I haven't posted in... :gasp: a week!

Anyway, things have been Really unpleasant for me this week. So it's probably better that I didn't write anything... cause it would have just been mean-spirited.

anyway, it's late and I should go to sleep. I just wanted to let everyone know I'm still alive.. Also, I suppose I'll drop at least 1 picture of which I haven't yet posted.


(aww. this was before the mask ripped) T.T

G'nite

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

The Man

Okay, well, No pictures of my own this time.
Anyway, I have been talking to the artist 'The Man' since I've made this site and
we've become friends. We've had a number of discussions involving
masking, fetish, art, furries, etc. etc. Anyway, he's consistantly had interesting
things to say so I figured I'd do an online interview of which I feel is completely
relevant to this site.

Enjoy and feel free to leave comments or questions here and I can forward them
to him.

How did you first get into latex/furries/rubber/x-dressing/cosplay
fetish?

That answer is rather long but I'll compress it down for public
consumption the best I can. As far back as when I was in grade school I always
remember having an attraction to female masks. I'd see occasional
depictions in media and I would love it. I still have no idea why it started
when I was so young. When I first noticed my attraction I was only 8 or
so, so why show an interest in a latex mask that portrayed women? I
still have no absolute answer as to why I enjoy them, simply ideas as to
what it could be. As I got older I got to experience new things and I
started to notice more around me. With the coming of the internet into my
home in the late 90's when I was 15, along came a lot of new places to
find things that interested me. Due to the fact that most female masks
are made out of latex or some other rubber compound, it was only
natural for me to be drawn to latex clothing. The internet became a gateway
to things I could only imagine. At first I had thought that I was the
only one who enjoyed female masks. That changed when I stumbled upon a
link from a latex site to Kerry's female mask site. I had found a whole
niche of folks who practiced making and wearing female latex masks. With
this new found group of people also came more links which lead me into
things like Kigurumi. For those who don't know, Kigurumi is a form of
masked cosplay found in Japan that is often performed onstage featuring
cartoon characters or videogame characters. One of the interesting
things about Kigurumi is the gender of the performer has no bearing on the
character they can play. At this same time I started to notice some of
the mask artwork out there. Most of it showed up on my friend
Closetmonster's site. At first it was bits and pieces but the collection on his
site quickly grew. Robert Hill's work was my first dealings with furry
and furry mask artwork. It was another one of those “Holy crap! That's
interesting, where can I see more?!” type of things. Thus began my
involvment in the furry and Kigurumi worlds. Naturally, since most female
maskers and Kigurumi performers are male, my interest in crossdressing
just came with the territory.

When did you first start drawing?

I first started drawing when I was very little and due to my rampant
lust for seeing more female mask pictures I started drawing my own in
gradeschool. Because of my fears of having my involvement with the subject
discovered I never drew more than a few at that time and most of poor
quality because of my lack of art experience. As the years went on I got
better at drawing in general so I'd take a stab at drawing some more
mask pieces. None of which were ever very good and are rotting in a
folder underneath my bed waiting for me to burn them. I really don't like my
oldest works but I do recognize their contributions to my ascension to
being a better artist. Around '99 or '00 is when I started to really
get into it a bit more and I even felt some of the stuff was good enough
to show off and it spiraled out of control from there.

Why did you start drawing?

I started drawing because I found out that I wasn't the only one who
drew stuff like this and I wanted to be part of it. It wasn't until about
the time Closetmonster's site first showed up that I saw other artist's
renderings of female masks. Robert Hill was one of the first few I saw
as I mentioned and his work is, in my opinion, some of the best stuff
still around. However, when I first saw Cally's work, I was floored. I
was amazed that anyone could achieve what Cally does when depicting
masks and suiting pictures. This sparked a deep urge to be able to make my
art look like that, it just required more practice. So I started
working on it. As time has gone on I have improved significantly from my
early days. Cally has been a great inspiration for me and we eventually
became friends. I'm still not nearly as good of an artist as Cally is but
we have this way of feeding off of each others work for motivation and
inspiration in some cases.
Have you ever had a fetish or cosplay experience?

It's actually kind of funny that a man who enjoys latex so much has
never actually worn any or been with anyone in it. My fetish range is
actually kind of broad and but I'm not actually sure they could be
considered fetishes. My love of latex started when I was too young to even
think about sex so how could it be a fetish? I'm not Sigmund Freud and I'd
probably just pass out and hit my head on the coffee table if I tried
to figure that question out. But to answer your question: no to the
fetish side and a sort of for the cosplay side. Because of the wonderful
friends who I have made over the years I have a few connections to
Kigurumi. One of my best friends was Yuri Tsukino, commonly known as the
mother of western Kigurumi. Yuri passed away this last June and it was
horrible to lose such a good friend but I was unbelievably lucky enough to
meet her early this year along with my other very dear friend Rabbit
from www.rabbitinthemoon.us. During this time I was able to dabble a
little bit with Kigurumi and fursuits. However, I never really did
Kigurumi, I did female masking using one of the Natori masks from Japan. I
actually just got the invoice for my Natori mask recently so it will be at
home waiting for me when I return from Iraq for me to enjoy :)

How was it?

It was a wonderful experience for me since it was the first time I
dressed up in a mask and outfit ever. However, it was only for a short
time, maybe an hour or so. This didn't bother me because of the company I
was in. It was just enjoyable for me to be able to spend time with my
friends. Now before someone thinks me some sick weirdo(as if you don't
already), because I don't consider Kigurmi or cosplay to be overly
sexual, this was just a time for me to enjoy myself and do something I loved.

I personally enjoy x-dressing in latex, but have never really tried
x-dressing through cosplay. Do you think that cosplay and latex x-dressing
differ?

They do differ but it really depends on what you want to get out of it.
Like I said, Kigurmi isn't about sex and latex doesn't have to be
either. To me, latex is something that can be very sexual but also be very
beautiful. The same could be said for Kigurmi, however in the
traditional sense, Kigurumi is meant to be cute which is how I see it. That does
not mean I don't ever see it as being attractive or sexual, it's just
not my primary focus with either interest for me. If you enjoy wearing
latex and dressing up as the other gender then it could be considered
the same as Kigurumi, just different means to an end.

When I x-dress I notice that it isn’t as sexual as much as it is an
identity shift, have you had a similar experience?

Because my experience is so limited with crossdressing I cannot provide
much insight, but I would have to say yes. After giving it much thought
when I have dressed up in a mask and costume I find that I am still the
same person but I am not hindered by my own convictions. I am free to
portray a character as with Kigurumi or enjoy having the appearance of a
different body with latex. My identity doesn't change but shift is
definitely a good way to describe it.

I’ve also noticed that you have strong furry and cartoon character
influences in your art. Why?

It's not something I can easily answer. I usually just draw what I
like. Cartoons have always been a big influence on me as I enjoyed them so
much when I was young watching them on Saturday mornings. I still watch
cartoons now at the age of 23. Over the time though as I matured,
cartoons matured as did my perceptions of some of the characters. It was
quite common to see Bugs Bunny dress up in drag in Looney Tunes and
because of that, it didn't seem all that awkward to do it with other
characters. Perhaps taking a character from an innocent cartoon like Road
Rovers(Colleen) and drawing a rubber bodysuit in her image is considered out
of the ordinary but where should the boundary be? My drawings are not
meant to be viewed by people who aren't of a mature age or nature so why
can't I update the characters I enjoyed as a kid to reflect my
interests as an adult? This is a question that a lot of people cannot get
around but my mind is pretty open. The reasoning behind my heavy furry
influences are mainly because as much as I love the human female body I'm
not terribly good at drawing their faces and since furry stuff is a big
interest of mine and a helluva lot easier to draw I figured I would
combine interests. So far it has worked out well and people seem to enjoy
it. I'm constantly improving on myself so be on the lookout for more
whacky stuff to come out of my corner.

(I still watch cartoons too. hehe)
I have almost no experience with the furries or the fetish, but I have
always been interested in it. I was just wondering how you see it?

The furry fandom can't be called a fetish because it is much more than
that. I won't try to explain it but I'll just lay down a few lines
fleshing it out a bit more for those who don't know anything about it.
Being a furry is not about sex. It's actually a small portion of it that
gets highlighted by bad publicity and shows like Sex2K which was run one
time on MTV. It's almost a lifestyle but in a hypothetical sense. I
like furries because it is something you don't normally see, it's
interesting :) Friends who I have shown my artwork that involves furries to
aren't familiar with the subject but they can appreciate the art and how
it looks in the end. Some even find it arousing even in just the sense
that it gets the hamster running on the wheel in their coconuts. I
personally see furries as harmless and kinda like Halloween but only with
animals. Like a big roleplaying game where all the girls have huge
breasts and aren't always girls ;). It's really a mind blowing subject and
cannot be explained very well by a Jarhead like me

Shifting gears; do you consider your art to be pornography?

Honestly, no.

Why?

I understand that some people get a sexual reaction from my artwork and
that is the point quite often. However I personally get no sexual
gratification out of my own artwork. I just identify it as something I
wanted to see so I drew it. As I mentioned earlier, none of this stuff
appears sexual to me all the time and pornography is sexual all the time.
Not to mention I haven't drawn anything that directly involves sex as of
yet but I have a few ideas which might come to fruition down the line
which are designed with the idea of sex solely in mind.

Ah, well. Thank you for the discussion, but we are running out of time.
Cut to a commercial! lol.
But yes, if you would like to see more of The Man's art, then link over to
his site (on the right of this page).

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Real life!

Ugh, I've been bogged down with Real life lately. So I haven't had much time for masking or latex. However, I haven't been thinking about it all that much..

Lately I've been predominantly busy informally teaching dance 4 days a week. Although, next week I'm formally teaching four classes, so I've been making choreography etc. in preparation. I've also been looking for a real job lately.

In my personal life; I've suddenly had a few desirable female options open to me (s'what happens when you teach dance), however I'm only interested in these girls in a physical sense. And honestly, I don't feel like even putting in the effort of allowing it to happen largely because I've recently met a girl of whom I am supremely interested in. However, I'm not totally sure why.. I think the biggest part is that she's unlike any other girl I've been involved with before (and that's a good thing considering my track record of being consistently cheated on and lied to). She's also going to be hard to get.. and regardless of how much I hate the chase, I'm drawn to it.

So, lots of my time lately has been spent scrutinizing over making a proper game-plan as to how I'm going to approach it.. I should have some sort of update on it by next week and a final answer within a few weeks.

but yeah, I'm really annoyed about my doll-suit busting and grey-catsuit ripping in 2 places! and as Closet said, ESPECIALLY NOW!
Very frustrating.

that is all.

The next post I'll try to drop some pix. I think I've got some stored away on my computer that I haven't yet let out here.

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